lucrezia, giovanni, gioffre and cesare
italian barmy army, the borgia family
our daddy was rodrigo
i had a monstrous ego
where he makes truoble we go
the borgia famiy

our tale begins renastance spain,
it's leadish were a shower
so i run out of patiance

Well, I'm a real life cowboy
Just a quiet, humble fella
That's what we're like
Apart from Mike
Yeah, I'm more of a yeller!

Sing songs to pass the evenings
And because it soothes the herd
So they won't stampede
Unless Mike sings lead

Welcome to our monastery
Please have a chair
Good to see you monks
So deep in prayer
Once the praying's finished
Your chores must be done
The main rule of a good monk's life is no fun

We have to pray eight times a day
Seven days a week

Of Egyptian Kings we know oh so many things,
'Cos the archaeologists have dug their tombs.
Now we're here to show, how to treat a dead pharaoh,
Make a mummy that can decorate you room.

First your dead kings lain on a table where his brain,
Is pull out with a wire through his nose!
Then his guts and lungs, stomach, liver must be bunged,
In four jars so they do not decompose.

Here we come,
Through the market square,
With our funny,
Clothes and hair.

Aristotle and Socrates,
Plato and Diogenes,
Four fat scholars,
With our Greek philosophies.

Twas the age of queen Victoria
A period notorious
So many brand new goods we did create.

Our list is long and glorious,
Though i don't intend to borious
Was a time of great invention

Was it really? What did we invent then?

For 40 years I ruled alone
She'd all those tears while on the throne
What got me through the pain and hurt
Was clinging to the memory of Albert.

I loved her so, my darling Vicky
So much, you know almost made me sicky
I was not liked in your country
But who cares when I had her love for me
Her love for me

I am William Wallace
My life was a mystery
Some say born twelve seven two
Some say twelve sixty three

Was dubbed Malcolm of Paisley
Maybe Alan from Aire
Did I have a wife or no?
Do you really care?

In good old Queen Victoria's day
Industrial revolution
Bosses said 'Please, we need more employees'
We needed a solution

Who will climb our chimneys?
Who will power our grids?
Victorian families to desperately poor
They'll let us employ their kids for

We're girlies from the 30s, wash the dishes, scrub the floor,
When all of a sudden our hubbies went to war
Did you think we'd shrink in England's needy hour?
Yeah what?
Course not!
Cos we got Girl power!

Our men are fighting World War Two
But we're not gonna boo hoo hoo
It's our World War Two too girls